Monday, October 30, 2006

2 days, 3 nights, 5 hours of sleep, 0 sanity

I am SO FUCKING hungover.

So, Friday night:

Party at Stephens. Scott comes over, wrapped up like a present with a card which states the totally obvious lie: From: God To: Women

God's gift to women? Puh-lease. And you know what? He was rejected all night too. Idiot.

Jamie picked us up, dressed as Tigger. I told Jam he was so gonna get laid, and it's true, throughout the night he got about 7 offers of sex by some seriously cute chicks, but he turned them down, he didn't wanna fuck drunk chicks. (I know! He's crazy)

So we go to this party (did I mention I'm a french maid?) and it's not too bad. It was full of people. I mean, it's a 8 and a half on two floors, and we were at least 250 people at the height of the night. Stephen was Leonardo. And it was cute. He was really busy thought, trying to greet everyone, and I didn't even get to be with him for more than 5 minutes, but I had fun.

We met these cute little chickitas from Halifax, dressed as firewomen. We hung out with them most of the night. I was trying to fend off Scott who, by midnight, had drunk half a bottle of JD, and was not only grabbing the chickitas, but me as well. So I punched him. Not in the jewels, but more like middle of the back. Fucker kept trying to put his hand up my skirt. I showed him thought.

So THEN, around 1:45am, 6 cop cars pull up and start shouting at us that we gotta get out. So the people who were leaving were going to come back in like 40 minutes. Except the cops wouldn't leave. They just sat in their cars, lights flashing and everything. Then they'd come out, and stand around talking, then go back to their cars. Weird.

Stephen was FREAKING OUT MANNNN cause he's american right? He was all "OMG I'm going to get DEPORTED!" We just laughed. It was pretty bad though, cause added to the wild array of booze and passed out bodies on the floor, there were at least 5 blunts going at any given moment. Bad news when the pigs are out.

Me and Jamie got bored (I was also getting chased by a Chp & Dales dancer, who would not leave me alone) so we got ready to leave. For the life of me, I could not find Scott. The retard lives in the suburbs so he drove his car to my place. We looked everywhere and there was no bloody sign of him. We asked around and the firewomen said they saw him leave, as did Tyrone, Betty & Veronica and Bacchus. So we left.

Around 4 in the morning I get a phone call from Stephen, informing me that Scott is outside, passed out on the patio couch, and not responding to summons. Steph assured me he liked me as much as ever, and that the fact that I brought Scott would not ruin my chances for an invite for next years partay. He did say that Scott was banned, a totally understandable thing to do, because I've resolved not to invite Scott anywhere that involves booze.

Scott cabbed it to my place around 10 am, walked in, and got in my bed. I immediatly screamed at him to get off my bed, or I would make sure he would be unable to procreate in the future. I sent him home, he annoyed me.

Anyways, that was Friday night.

Saturday I spent in my boxers watching horror movies and getting ready to go out with Cas & CG and the gang. The house party (where I incidentally met Cas last year) was pretty good, althought there were a LOT less people that last year. In the basement this band called Doctor Kink played, and they were fucking awesome. Afterwards, we all sat around and then decided to go to Green Room. It was pretty chill.... we only stayed about an hour...then CG did something I never thought he would EVER do. He put my head on his shoulder and held me. I know, crazy right? And when his brother and gf came back from outside he kept his arm around me. A fucking mircale. And then, once again to my amazement, he invited me back to his place. So we cabbed it to his house, and I spent the night. We woke up around 2pm, and when I tried to sneak out (keep in mind I'm dressed like a maid, with a jacket sort of covering me) he decides to introduce me to his mom. HIS FUCKING MOM. I AM DRESSED LIKE A WHORE, NOT MOM MEETING MATERIAL DAMMIT!

So I tried to discuss her modern dance show, and she was very very sweet. I liked her, althought I don't know if she thought the same of me, considering the way I was dressed. I ran to the cab and went home.

So when I walked up my building, a Domino's delivery dude was waiting for the door, and just stared at me with his mouth wide open. I said "Good morning, I just got back from work" and he looked relieved and nodded, as if all was right in the world. Bastard.

I wasn't in the door 2 minutes before Zucchi called and told me he was picking me up to go eat in 10 minutes. So I only had time to put on jeans, wash my face and brush my teeth before he showed. We went for vietnamese, then we went looking for Beaver Tails, but they're closed in the winter! That's so SHITTY! Anyways, we ended up going to Chinatown, getting bubble tea and dragon beard candy, before the sub zero temperature scared uo back to the car.

I got home around 7pm, and had a few glasses of wine, in a vain attempt to ease my 2 day hangover (I'd been poping tylenol + advil all day to no avail). Let me just say that it didn't work. I crashed around midnight.

So tonight, my first night alone since last wednesday, I'll be in front of my TV, watching the NHL network in HD.

Good times my friends, good times.

Thursday, October 26, 2006

how to write when not inspired?

I don't know.

Yeah, I couldn't think of a title....

Work has been pretty nuts. We just closed this HUGE deal that I've been working on since March, so that's sort of good. Exept that now that everything is signed, the real work starts. *sigh* It never bloody ends.

I'm at a point in my life where I hate everything about me and my life. My body, my salary, my apartment, my job, my situation, my lack of self confidence. It's just that I always thought there would be more to life than just...this. It's like I'm moving in a world of black and white, and I don't like it one bit.

I've come to a realization that me and CG will never be anything unless he lets me in. He acts like he doesn't know me in public (At my birthday supper, my friend Scott asked him what was wrong with me, because the waiter was warmer to me than he was. The worst part is that it was true.)

So I'm taking him as he is, just a guy who I see a few times a week, and that's it. We're just dating. It's been 2 1/2 months, and I've finally figured out where it's going. So at least I have the direction, it'll be easier now. No pressure. Just two people.

Last Wednesday as I was walking through the McGill gates, a guy was biking out of campus. He must have been distracted for a second, because he was coming fast, and straight at me. At the last second I cried out and jumped out of the way. I almost died! Okay, that's a lie. But I could have been seriously injured, which is no joke.

He apologized, introduced himself as Stephen, and we just....started talking. And we really hit it off. We ended up going to Hurley's for a few pints, and for the first time since Nacos (which was a year ago) I felt something. I couldn't identify it at first, but then it hit me: butterflies.

I had butterflies in my stomach. He was cute, engaging, smart and funny. And I liked him. After all the boys I dated since Nacos (there are about 9, including CG), I felt butterflies for an engineering student who almost impalled me with his bike.

The Habs were playing, and there's no way I would miss a game, so I did something bold. I invited him for beers and the game at my place. He agreed.

He biked, I took the bus. He's originally from Cincinnatti, but has been here for 4 years. And he doesn't know much about hockey, so I spent the commercial breaks explaining the rules to him, what was 'icing' etc. He still doesn't get it...

He left around midnight, I went outside on the corner of the street (mind you it was about 6 degrees, I was in fuzzy Paul Frank slippers, chili boxers and a sweater) and tried to explain to him how to get home (the Plateau) from my place (NDG). I was so cold my teeth were chattering. And we were both tired and had to get up early, but we both lingered... I kind of went for the kill. I leaned in and kissed him. He kissed me back but pulled away abruptly. He started laughing and then grabbed me, hugged me and patted me on the back. It was such a weird thing to do. He looked totally shocked at what he did. Then he was on his way.

We emailed each other...he apologized for the pat, stating that he was just really shy. He said he was happy that I made the move, because he tried to all night and failed.

He's invited me to his place for a Halloween party tomorrow....although I don't think I'll go, because I'm going to this other party with Cas on Saturday, and nobody wants to go out on Friday. Stephen has been trying to convince me, but so far I've resisted. I mean, I'm not going by myself, to a party where nobody I know is (except for 1), dressed like a sluty french maid, complete with feather duster and garters, what is he, crazy?

Anyways, that's about it for me so far....I've decided that the date when my feet cross the threshold of the Habs Dressing room will be December 2nd, when we battle our arch nemesis: Toronto. Game on my friends, game on.

Thursday, October 19, 2006

shaddap, I'm uninspired, not happy and lazy

Stole this from the delicious Mrs. Bad Critiq:


1. Do you sleep with the closet door open or closed?
open
2. Do you take the shampoos and conditioner bottles from hotel?
oh yes
3. Have you ever 'done it' in a hotel room
yup
4. Have you ever stolen a street sign before?
a duck crossing sign in grade 9
5. Do you like to use post-it notes?
uh huh
6. Do you cut out coupons but then never use them?
what am I an old maid? NO
7. Would you rather be attacked by a big bear or a swarm of a bees?
they're both horrible ways to go....bear
9. Do you always smile for pictures?
no
10. What is your biggest pet peeve?
people who are late
11. Do you sleep with your sheets tucked in or out?
in
12. Do you ever count your steps when you walk?
why would I do that?
13. Have you ever peed in the woods?
when I went camping
14. Do you ever dance even if there's no music playing?
no! I'm not crazy!
15. Do you chew your pens and pencils?
I suck the end on my pens...it's gotten me in trouble at meetings
16. How many people have you slept with this week?
1
17. Do you like popcorn from those big tins?
nope
18. What is your "Song of the week"?
Umm... "You And Whose Army" Radiohead
19. Is it okay for guys to wear pink?
yeah
20. Do you still watch cartoons?
yeah
21. What's your favorite scary movie?
don't have one
22. Where would you bury hidden treasure if you had some?
on my private island
23. What do you drink with dinner?
wine/water/beer/champagne
24. What do you dip a chicken nugget in?
bbq sauce
25. What is your favorite food/ cuisine?
sushi/vitenamese
26. What movies could you watch over and over and still love?
a lot dude
27. Last person you kissed/kissed you?
Steph...my blind date
28. Were you ever a boy/girl scout?
ha, no
29. Would you ever strip or pose nude in a magazine?
for one million dollars
30. When was the last time you wrote a letter to someone on paper?
jesus, 1993?
31. Can you change the oil on a car?
no...I'D LIKE TOT SEE YOU TRY TO MAKE A ROAST MOFO
32. Ever gotten a speeding ticket?
I failed my driving exam for speeding
33. Ran out of gas?
my step-mom almost pulled a Kramer with me in the car once
34. Favorite kind of sandwich?
umm terrine
35. Best thing to eat for breakfast?
eggs, toast, sausages, bacon, potatoes mmm
36. What is your usual bedtime?
11-midnight
37. Are you lazy?
can't you tell?
38. When you were a kid, what did you dress up as for halloween?
what year? one time I was a dinosaur, one time a TMNT, one time a toothbrush
40. How many languages can you speak?
3
41. Do you have any magazine subscriptions?
British Vogue
42..Which are better legos or lincoln logs?
legos all the way
43. Are you stubborn?
yes
44. Who is better...Leno or Letterman?
STEWART!
45. Ever watch soap operas?
no
46. Afraid of heights?
yes
47. Sing in the car?
yes
48. Dance in the shower?
I'd fall and break my head
49. Dance in the car?
yes
50. Ever used a gun?
a nail gun
51. Last time you got a portrait taken by a photographer?
umm, for grad in 2002
52. Do you think musicals are cheesy?
no dude: BOLLYWOOD BABY
53. Is christmas stressful?
yes, I'm very poor
54. Ever eat a pierogi?
mmmm yes
55. Favorite type of fruit pie?
Pumpkin...is that even a fruit? whatever, pumpkin
56. Occupations you wanted to be when you were a kid?
Marine Biologist, wife of Indiana Jones
57. Do you believe in ghosts?
dunno
58. Ever have a Deja-vu feeling?
yup
59. Take a vitamin daily?
I try, jamie gave me a box for my bday
60. Wear slippers?
at home, my cute paul frank ones
61. Wear a bath robe?
yup
62. What do you wear to bed?
nothing
63. First concert?
don't you DARE laugh at me, New Kids On The Block, I WAS 5 YEARS OLD!
64. Wal-Mart, Target or K-Mart?
yuk to all
65. Nike or Adidas?
adidas
66. Cheetos or Fritos?
neither
67. Peanuts or Sunflower seeds?
umm peanuts
68. Ever hear of, "gorp"?
Itsa movie from the 80s
69. Ever take dance lessons?
yup
70. Is there a profession you picture your future spouse doing?
err no
71. Can you curl your tongue?
yup
72. Ever won a spelling bee?
i made 3rd in the nationals when I was 8
73. Have you ever cried because you were so happy?
yes
74. Own any record albums?
all of the beatles
75. Own a record player?
yup
76. Regularly burn incense?
oil
77. Ever been in love?
yes
78. Who would you like to see in concert?
umm Interpol again
79. What was your last concert you saw?
The Robinnes
80. Hot tea or cold tea?
both
81. Tea or coffee?
both
82.Favorite kind of cookie?
ummm my espresso ones
83.Can you swim well?
yup
84.Can you hold your breath w/o manually holding your nose?
yup
85. Are you patient?
sometimes
86. DJ or band, at a wedding?
umm... band
87. Ever won a contest?
yes
88. Ever have plastic surgery?
nope
89. Which are better black or green olives?
both
90.Can you knit or crochet?
ya right
91. Best room for a fireplace?
whatever room I'm in
92. Do you want to get married?
dunno
93. If married, how long have you been married?
see above
94. Who was your HS crush?
umm Steve O...
95. Do you cry and throw a fit until you get your own way?
no!
96. Do you have kids?
no! yuck
97. Do you want kids?
i dunno
98. Whats your favorite color?
blue
99. Do you miss anyone right now?
my cousin
100. Who do you wanna see right now?
I can't say

Monday, October 16, 2006

21 years, it's all downhill from here

Well, it's my birthday.

I'm sorry I haven't posted, but work has been really busy. And since it's my only internet access, well, it's kind of hard to find time to post.

I'm not happy. I'm very unhappy. Stuff has happened and it just makes me miserable. I'll try to post tomorrow.

Be good guys.

Friday, October 6, 2006

You see? I DO do cultural things

So last night was CG's mum's show. I'm calling it a "show" because when I refered to it as ballet, I got dirty looks from some of the older audience members. So I said modern dance, and others gave me dirty looks likes "How dare she?!". So I called it a show.

I met up with Cas, Jay and Sherri, and we went for a beer before the show. I hadn't gone to Regis in a long, long, long time... It was dead thought, not surprising for a Thursday evening at 7pm. Sex-Ballet or Sexlet or Ballex was born... I might elaborate further at some point, let me just say now that it involves Cas, a girl doing the splits, and a blowjob. Nice.

We met up with CG and his bros at the box office, I got a "paid" ticket, Cas gave me this look and I was all "I paid for it with special currency, man" with a wink. Ahhh dirty jokes. The older people didn't appreciate as much as we did. Their loss. That shit is mad funny.

CG was, well, standoffish, the WHOLE night. He didn't even kiss me, he like did this weird peck on the cheek but so lightly I didn't even feel it. He made sure to be fully in sight of everybody without touching me or looking at me, nothing.

The show itself, was really really beautiful. It was packed with raw emotion, the dancers were really good. I was really impressed.

After the show, we were figuring out what we would do. CG had an exam the next day, and he was using it as an excuse not to come out. But it's totally understandable. He was like "You guys are invited back to my place for champagne" and Cas was like "Dude, we're going to Hatters" and then, for the first time that night, CG looked at me and asked if I was going to his place with him. I said no. I knew that if I did go, I would end up standing around, by myself, while he would avoid questions as to who I was, and why the hell was I drinking the celebratory champagne. So I went out with the gang.

We had a few pitchers and laughs, and it definately brought back memories...of when I was like 16. Me and Jay and Cas went to La Belle Province for some food...it had been two days since I'd eaten, and it was radishes, so I inhaled my 2 steamies like a champ. We then went to the arcade, where I took my leave of the boys, asking them to forward my goodbyes to the rest of the gang who was still at Hatters.

I made it to the bus (I ran for it more like) and got home around 1am. Which is very reasonable.

I was in a blue mood this morning thought, the vibe from CG last night was a real downer. But lo and behold, as I was writing this, he called me. At like 11am. Anyways, I feel better. I'll feel much better when we rape Buffalo tonight.

GO HABS GO!

Wednesday, October 4, 2006

This just in

Due to several EVIL and FALSE comments made by Bailey, I'm no long typing to him. He knows I'm sensitive (i.e. stark raving mad) during Hockey season, and that I do my duty as a Montrealer by upholding certain rivalries.

In other news...

I'm turning 21 in 12 days. I'm going to be OLD! I was at the pharmacy, and some eye wrinkle creams have instructions on the back saying "For better result, start use at the age of 25" 4 years left before I start getting wrinkles! Oh what a fucking joyous event to look forward to: wrinkle creams.

My week is choc-full of work, I haven't eaten anything but an apple and 7 radishes since Monday night, I'm soooo fucking busy! Tomorrow night I'm going with Cas to CG's mum's ballet thingny. Then Friday is game night at Cas' hacienda. Ole?

Monday, October 2, 2006

I banged that cowbell good


So we beat the Senators 6-5 on Saturday night (HA! Kiss my ass Ottawa!). We also traded the last of the "Three Amigos"... Ribeiro was traded for Janne Niinimaa from the Dallas Stars. He's a great defencement, and hopefully he won't be a cocky bastard like Ribeiro was.

The "Three Amigos" were (and I say were, because none of them are with the Habs anymore) Jose "Pretty Boy" (as I called him) Theodore who was shipped off for being the most inconsistent goalie in the history of the universe, for whom I didn't have much respect for, and for who I lost that last thread of respect when he was caught making out with that dumb American Paris Hilton. Ugh. Also part of the trio was Pierre Dagenais, who went to the Hamilton Bulldogs with the AHL (eww). And of course Ribeiro.

Bye bye buddy. I won't miss you.

I went out with CG to Brutopia, and it turns out that his buddy Ray was doing the percussions with the band that was playing. We hung out with him before the show, and then we managed to score some seats right in front of the stage (if you are familiar with Bru's, you know how lucky that is). Ray isn't with the band, he was hired for the night. And he's AMAZING. He didn't even know what they were playing, and he's just make up accompanyments, like with the bongos, or drums or COWBELLS!

After the first set, the band came to sit with us, and they were real chill. I drank 'em all under the table, CG included. Then during their first song of the second set, Ray kept calling me over, so I went, and I ended up playing the cowbell and the bongos with them. It was pretty fun actually, everyone was cheering me on (I was swaying at this point, damn you Raspberry Blonde beer! Why must you be so delicious!). When I got off, I got a round of applause, I curtsied, and went back to the table. Rob (the lead singer) was all "Thanks babe, Monika everybody, Mooooonika: the Habs babe" I guess I had been kind of vocal about our victory, and my bright red Habs cap wasn't exactly subtle either.

Me and CG took out leave around 2am, and we cabbed it back to my place. I was waaayyy drunk (6 pints, and a pint is 2 beers) and I don't remember anything. CG says I was real boring, I fell asleep before he could molest me. Oops.

The next morning (technically it was the afternoon but for us it was morning) we talked for a bit after...stuff, and I asked him how many people he was seing apart from me, he said 4 in total. He asked me, I answered 7, him not included.

He then said "Yeah, no, you're the only one" And I said "Aww, well, it's actually 7 including you".

Har har, hardy har. What a wit I am.